Snap Ya Bra Strap

Because I love you bbs. Thank ma girl, SuziQ, for blasting this one out on email before the end of the work day.

I. Am. Dying.



Consider this a double gift day Friday!

Gift Day Friday: verbing your nouns

I've mentioned recently that I've moved offices. My entire division got relocated with several hundred other people to a swanky renovated floor in our dilapidated office building.

One of the funniest things about moving is the unpacking.

Funniest? Yea, I said it. I find unpacking funny. Because, you see bbs, when we packed we blindly threw stuff into boxes, thinking "bah we'll just deal with this later."

Cough, procrastination, cough.

While unpacking we came across some craptastic junk collected over the years. There is, for example, a picture of my boss sitting at her desk, superimposed next to hockey player. In this photo both the hockey player and my boss, Chico, are sporting mustaches. Under normal circumstances, you would never thought they look alike. But with Chico's painted on (literally, MSpaint) mustache, they could be twins!

But even better than that, Kimmel uncovered a collection of notebook paper that he and I scribbled on while actively participating in and paying close attention at a training seminar a few years ago. These doodled images were created in the fashion of Teen Girl Squad. If you aren't familiar with Teen Girl Squad on Homestar Runner's website, I highly recommend watching this video. And this one, while you are at it.

Good ahead. I'll wait...........

Funny, right? Okay so, these senseless comic utilize the humor of "verbing a noun" as I like to call it. For example if a character gets shot by a million arrows, it is appropriate to say that she was "arrowed." Similarly, if a character was run over by a brain, you could say she was "cerebellumed." Get it? Good.

So at the training seminar, Kimmel and I passed the time by "verbing a noun" on paper. We would draw actions and then label them. For example, I started by drawing a basic smiley face. Kimmel added some detail and called it "animaed." I elaborated by drawing a golf club shot to the head, thus resulting in "callowayed."

Here's another clip of images we developed:

click to enlarge

One of my favorites:

Anywho, if our creative display of art doesn't cheer up your mood, then at least you were (re)introduced to the idiotic awesomeness that is Teen Girl Squad, which you can spend the next four hours watching. Love you bbs, Happy Friday.

conversations with strangers

While paying for my Domo coffee at 7Eleven this morning, the guy behind the counter this morning said to me, "You are so young. Why do you have white hair?"

His voice was so sincere. The most genuine expression of concern spread across his face.

I laughed to him- this man that has now seen me every other morning for the past month. "No, no. It's just highlights."

He regards me with further doubt, "Okay miss. But maybe rest, yes?"

I guess this is what I get for bleaching platinum blond patches into my hair. In a ponytail the hair blends and gives it a greying look. Next time I'll get up 15 minutes earlier and actually style my hair. But best believe I'm gonna need a bigger cup of coffee.

Thanks Buntz, for sharing that article about bajingos and how they sometimes fall out of a woman's body

When I meet other bloggers or followers of my blog in real life they will often say that they favor stories or guest posts about a particular friend.

I love blogging about my friends. The give me endless material. There's Danny Dater's womanizing escapades. SuziQ's adventure at a date auction. Or Jiggs's one time encounter with a good Samaritan.

I owe thanks to my friends for being sources of inspiration and humor. And now, on TMI Thursday, I need to pay special tribute to one friend in particular.

Buntz. That gutter-minded, too much information knowing and sharing, heck of a gal. I've brought her to a few blogger meet ups in the past, where someone has always said "Oh youuur Buntz?! You're my favorite!!"

And I completely understand. I mean what's not to love?! Buntz is my go-to girl for sharing all that is vile, tummy turning, and downright TMI. Maybe it's the fact that she's subscribed to a dozen health related blogs in her google reader. Or maybe it's because deep down there's really a 14 year-old boy in that body of hers, egging her on to do & say the things that most of us cringe at but secretly find funny.

So Buntz, I raise my glass to you on this TMI Thursday, in thanks for letting me blow up your phone (most recently, last week) with disgusting texts about vom-bombing broom closets at parties. I love that you don't judge me :)

And for all you faithful readers, here is the latest installment of "weird shit Buntz emails me" to be thoroughly enjoyed on this mighty fine TMI Thursday. Click here.


And for more TMI, visit LiLu's page by clicking on the thumbnail below.

That Jeffrey Dean Morgan is a hottie

I wanted to be productive today. I'm off from work and planned to run a few errands, clean, cook, and even work out.

But then I watched PS I LOVE YOU, and if you've seen the movie then you know it's damn near impossible to function after that cry fest.

Cheers to a rainy day that has been spent in bed with Netflix.

engagement, reunions, and ticker-tape

On Saturday morning I woke up insanely early (read: 6am) to shower, get ready, and metro over to Shoe's house. We had plans to leave DC at 8am for a quick weekend trip up to NJ. The reason?

My best friend is getting married! Well, in 20 months. But his engagement party was scheduled for Saturday night, and I'll be damned to have missed that!



The drive to the Garden State went well. Less than 5 hours and we were at my parents house enjoying homemade sushi by Super Dad. Sushi making is his new hobby. The dog sweater vest making adventure was short lived.

We took a quick nap before getting dolled up and heading over to Portabello's restaurant in Oakland. The venue was really nice. A Cute and modern Italian restaurant with an impressive menu and ample party space.



Speaking of party space, this is where things get interesting. Fatty's older brother, who was in attendance at the engagement party, snuck away to drop in to his 20 year high school reunion. Which took place IN THE SAME place where Fatty's engagement party was. What a coincidence?!

Why is this relevant? Because naturally, Shoe, myself, and few other bridal party members decided to crash the reunion that hosted classes from several decades.



We slowly started with some under the radar fist pumping by the class of '87 table...



...before kicking it into full gear in front of the class of '64.



Absurdity. Too many free gin & tonics later, we moved the party to a local bar where more faces joined us in celebration.


Here's Kevi showing me paper confetti he collected at the ticker-tape parade last week. Apparently it was still in his coat, and was incredibly useful in our weekend festivities.

Congrats to Fatty and his beautiful fiance, Finn.



Love you both. Can't wait for your wedding even tho it's like eleventy-billion days away.

Mondays are as cool diaper rash and butt hemroids

So tired.

So busy at work.

So gonna have to update you with tales from my ridiculous weekend later on. Get excited. The story starts with me waking up in DC and ending my night at a Class of '64 high school reunion in Jersey.

Enjoy this photo. Totally relevant.

Gift Day Friday: Let me amaze you with my vocabulary

Yesterday was a day of learning for me. I had three major revelations.

1. I cannot think of a single reason NOT to buy a McDonald's Hamburgler costume.

2. My eBay obsession has reached alarming heights.

The third revelation is unrelated to these two, but still noteworthy. We were at an "ALL HANDS" meeting, meaning everyone and their mother that works in our office were gathered around the kitchen sink. The new deputy in charge, or whatever, introduced himself to us using a multitude of SAT words. Once of which threw me for a loop.

"Chagrin."

It wasn't the way he used it. I know it's definition and have used it myself on occasion. It's the way he said it.

"Shaye-grine." Just like that. A "shhhh" plus a hard "aye" plus "grine," with a long "i" sound that put too much emphasis on the wrong syllable.

And I thought to myself, "Mb, you putz. You've been mispronouncing this word for years*!" I felt like a fool all day. 24 straight hours. Until now, when I finally looked it up and found out Mr. Deputy Man is wrooong. And I've been right all along :)

So bbs, on this fine Gift Day Friday, I present you with the proper way to say "chagrin," so that you never doubt yourself in front of higher ranking authority like I did. No need to thank. Just doing my job and looking out for the common folk.

Chagrin. Pronounced "shuh-grin," with proper emphasis placed on each syllable. Defined as a keen feeling of mental unease, as of annoyance or embarrassment, caused by failure, disappointment, or a disconcerting event (comical how the definition fits the storyline?).

TGIF loves. Have a great weekend.


* for all ya'll counting, this was revelation #3. albeit, short-lived.

Facebook wouldn't let me post this photo, so clearly it belongs in a TMI post

The best part about this Halloween costume that I saw on the bar crawl Saturday night...

...was the girl standing near me who shouted, "OMG it's like 2 feet looong!"

Want more TMI? Of course!! Check out LiLu's domain. She's like the encyclopedia of TMI tales.